This is Ahmet. Another one of those special people. I have very few special people in my life. I have mentioned a few here. My good friend Florian…Traviz ..shirin my beloved bro Anas ..and a few others. My brain isnt thinking. I am starting out with Ahmet. There are few things i wanna state to people. Ahmet has always respected my dancing. He is from a conservative culture. He is Muslim. Yet, he never discourages my dancing. Never looks at me in a wrong way. He is a good soul. And i love him for his good friendship.
He had a knee operation. And i am praying for him. Those who read this blog, please pray for him as well.
Well, i wanna start off with a very uncomfortable situation. I love bellydancing. All my good friends know that. My family knows that. Everyone knows i dont dance to seduce anyone! But some asians, are under the impression that just because i dance i can be touched any way.
This goes to some people who had been very unkind towards me. My body is my property. I know you are being friendly. But,, please keep your hands to yourself. Whether you are younger or older, it doesnt matter. You are a guy, And i dont like it. I dance cos i love dancing. Not because i am some public property. I never do this in my blog. But i am very angry. I dont have the guts to tell you. So i am blogging. Those who are guilty of it, please understand me.
Its the culture. ASIA i guess does not respect a woman who love to dance? Just because a girl likes bellydance, does not mean you can behave any way you like. And especially indians. Some indians. Some really bad group of indians.
I know you are friends. But there are certain ways to behave with them. I dont like telling people off. I am still quite handicapped. I cant believe this world is so backward in their thinking. I am upset. I always blog something useful. But now i am just ranting.
I can advise everyone to react immediately when they are being handled in a way they dont like. It sometimes make me want to take down all my videos and run into a small hole. I cannot dance without being respected. Because i am a woman. And indian at that?
Honestly, i am very hurt. I want to tell you badly that i dont like it. When i move away, i am trying to tell you not to continue. Yet, you keep doing it. I am angry.
My small world
My small world comprises of very few people. I dont have much friends. I dont have a big social circle like my elder sister. I love all my friends. And yes my brother. I am crying nowdays. I still miss him. I want him so badly. I want to tell him how i feel about this. He was like an umbrella to me, protecting me from stupid people. I am like alone now. Fending for myself. Its always nice to have an elder bro who looks out 4 u. Sometimes i dream i am running towards him. When bad things happen, i wish i die quickly so i can be with him. I dont want to marry. Cos i cant imagine a wedding without him. I remeber how i used to run to him when i was a kid. It felt so good to sit on his lap. Go bike rides with him. I dont dare go back to India. I am scared to face the reality. I love you so much bro