After such a long time, i am going to write a post which reflects my true feelings about the society. I miss writing them. This may be a bellydance blog now, but i cant help but use this as a place to talk out what i feel. A week back, i had a makeup assignment for an indian lady. This post might be a little biased. To be precise, i think its important to note she is a Singaporean tamil lady who is about 35. When i was putting on makeup for her, we had a nice chat. She kept talking about how often she goes for manicures and facials. And how bad she felt she hadnt done one.
I experienced this when i was working as well. Women who go for spa treats. facials even during lunchbreak. I almost wanted to tell her… “Its been years since i went to one”. But i stopped, because i guess i wanted to uphold the image that all makeup women encourage facials. My people, Malayalees are known for their simplicity. If you watch our movies, there is not an ounce of makeup on them. Maybe deep inside me, i uphold that culture very strongly. I love makeup. But, like ive told all of you earlier, i have an obsessive nature. Its makeup today, tommrow it might be body art.
I dont thread my eyebrows. I dont do facials. I dont rebond my hair. I dont do hair treatmeant. Did you all note, that i NEVER dye my hair? Well, i find many asians trying to imitate the western culture blindly. I am an indian. I am born with black dark hair. And i am proud of it. But many singaporean young women actually dye their hair and wear colored contact lenses. I dont do any of those. And i wont do it in the future. I have nothing against any culture. Its just that i am very proud of my origin. Its been almost a year since i went for a pedicure. I dont color my nails. I have never done a manicure before. I love doing massages on others but ive never been to one before.
I dont use moisturiser. I dont use special facial cleansers. I DONT USE PERFUMES. Many people are surprised by my lack of interest in perfumes. I love the natural arabic perfume oil. I love the smell of musk. I think musk is for guys. But i love it and i wear it. But not everyday. I use deodrants. But not all the time. I dont stink. So i guess i dont need it.
I spend money on organic shampoos and conditioners. I am willing to fork out cash to avoid chemicals and to promote health. I dont like chemicals. I love using henna on my hands. I guess its really not in my blood. I cant be singaporean.
There is a stereotype that singaporean women are expensive. I am not. In fact, i dont expect you to pay for my dinner on a date. I would hate it. I like to care and share. I dont mind paying for you, Not because i am egoistic. Its because i care for that person. I dont expect a guy to fork out cash on me. Its not fair. He really has a life too!
Did i mention, i despise expensive restuarants. The ambience is all great. I remeber once eating in some top indian restuarnt with my good freind. He paid more than 100 for a meal. I was sinking in my seat at the thought of 100 BUCKS FOR A MEAL! I CAN COOK BETTER THAN THAT!!. The food was nice anyways. But that 100 bucks could have been a donation for poor people, 100 people could have eaten food that day.
Do you know where i like to eat?
Cofeeshops. Dont be surprised to see a nicely dressed sabreena (shanu) sitting in a coffeeshop or hawker center drinking her favorite tea! I am very particular about dressing. Thats the only thing i am particular about. Not because of beauty. Dresses dont make u look beautiful. It shows who you are. I dress to match what i feel. If i am dressed like an indian who gt lost in sinagpore, it would tell you i am holding onto my culture strongly.
HOW MUCH DO I PAY FOR MY DRESSSES
I know of women who pay 60 bucks for a top. 300 for a top. But thanks to god, women’s clothes are much cheaper here. I pay around 30 bucks. Thats it. Or sometimes 20. I create my own fashion most of the time. I dont really believe spending too much money is good. I feel guilty and remmeber poor people. Dorothy perkins is a great shop. But, the guilt of buying from there will kill me. I fork out money for my dance. But not too much again. I dont mind forking out cash to learn an art. I love learning
I am weird. If you ask people who know me, they would tell you. A little eccentric. But i am not a bad person. I am just very different i guess. I never fit anywhere. And i dont think i want to. Some guy friends have told me how women change their voices when they speak to their boyfriends or some special guys. Their voices become husky more sexy. And they tell me how different i am. I have a chipmunk voice over the phone. Its just me. I crack wild jokes, I dont feel i should always be ladylike.
Flattery and me
We dont go well together. I dont know how to deal with flattery. Flattery is nice. But i am lost when it comes to dealing with it. I say, “Thanks”, and quickly change the topic to, “hey hows your day!”. And its so obvious sometimes, that people tell me, “hey shanu stop changing the topic!”.
I guess i dont belong here. I never wanted to be part of this culture. I like being different. If you say short skirts are fashionable, you will see me in long skirts. I do things opposite. I like bellydance cos no one does it. No one knows it. Its hidden. And i want to project it.
Singaporeans to me are very safe thinkers. Cliche. But great people. Carefree attitudes. Kind and generous. But, i am very much the malayalee. To me its important to be different. Most malayalee women have a great sense of humor. Try dating a few. lol. Its super rare in singapore to find a pure malayalee. I dont know if i plan to stay in sinagpore. I want to run away somewhere quiet. A forest. Or a farm. Adopt a child from a war country. Help people. Oh yes, bellydance and then die 🙂